Ram delivered this statement at the United Nations Security Council (Arria Formula Meeting) on June 12, 2024 during a debate on the Protection of Civilians in Armed Conflict: Prevent and Respond to Persons Going Missing Across the Globe. Scroll down for media reaction in Nepal

Thank you, Excellency for this opportunity to share my practical reflections as a representative of families of the missing and the disappeared.

First of all, I wish to thank ambassador Ms. Pascale Baeriswyl, from the permanent mission of Switzerland to the United Nations for this event, in coordination with the Global Alliance for the Missing.

I come from a family directly affected by disappearances, with my father having disappeared during Nepal’s armed conflict in 2001.

Imagine surviving the horrors of a war, only for your father, mother, siblings or children to go missing. What happens to those who remain when a family member is lost not to death or relocation, but to an enforced disappearance or having gone missing? How do the people left behind cope with that tragedy and move on?

These questions have been part of my personal life for years. My own experiences have connected with other families of the missing around the world, as they suffer, look for an answer, and search for their loved ones.

But the world has not done enough to acknowledge the suffering of the families or to address their needs.

It’s a very personal cause for me and for thousands of families. I never imagined how hard the fight would be, and could not stand by without doing something.

I became engaged in the search process, which has evolved from my suffering alone to becoming a collective search with other victims who share my pain.

I have spent the last two decades working with the families of missing, initially in my home district, later throughout Nepal and now at the international level, where I stand today in front of the UN Security Council.

I am here today for those who are not here but have the same demand: to know the truth about their missing loved one.

Allow me to highlight three key concerns of families: the search for the missing, addressing the breadth of their needs and their desire for peace.

On search for missing persons: States have the responsibility to search and provide answers to the families. But we, the families, are much more than victims of wars and conflict. Through our local influence and networks we are the first to search when a person goes missing and to provide support and strength to each other. We put our lives at risk looking for any relevant piece of information.

Families never stop searching. Even when official search mechanisms do exist, families are ever present in their communities, and will not give up. Creating an environment in which families feel safe, protected, and legitimized in their search efforts is key to help us find our missing loved ones. Both states in general and dedicated official search mechanisms must set up a formal way of interacting with families. The approach will vary, based on locally relevant solutions, according to each country’s specific traditions and contexts. But the common thread everywhere will be the presence and active interest of the families. This will not only allow information to be shared by families, but for families to be heard by these institutions.

There are countless examples of successful efforts – even legislative ones – initiated by associations of families worldwide: from the most well-known – the adoption of the International Convention for the Protection of All Persons from Enforced Disappearance – to the dozens of national laws that were adopted thanks to the tireless advocacy of family movements. Recently, for example, I was also moved by how Syrian families of the missing and their associations through their mobilization and organizing persuaded the UN General Assembly to establish the Independent Institution on Missing Persons in Syria.

Yet many families don’t even have such associations to fall back on. I know of many places where individuals are trying to organize themselves into associations or more formal structures to speak as one with authorities. Many such families remain largely excluded from search efforts. We call on States to support the formation and resourcing of such associations as one way of effective participation and representation of concerns of families in search processes.  

Secondly, on the needs of families: While families are active searchers, the impact on families of missing persons is significant. Families have economic, social, administrative, land and property rights, psychosocial and mental health needs that are real. What happens when the main breadwinner is gone? What happens when you cannot register your child in school because you need the signatures of both parents, and one is missing without any such legal status? How can you keep living your daily life with the pain of an absent family member?

We would strongly encourage States to determine how each of these aspects can be addressed through support, starting from legislation and policies that provide a support framework, down to programmes to meet individual needs.

Thirdly, on connection to peace: I welcome an emphasis on ensuring that missing persons are addressed in mediation processes – whether these are comprehensive peace agreements or processes with a narrower focus. No person can be at peace with the absence of a family member, and peacebuilding in societies cannot be done without seeking to provide answers at an individual level. Family members searching for loved ones are also peacebuilders. This has been recognized recently in legislation under consideration in Colombia which recognizes individuals searching for missing persons as peacebuilders and affords protection in view of the risks they face. So, resolving missing cases is central to peacebuilding, and in this, the role of families, and family associations, is crucial. Including families or families associations from all sides in peace processes is one effective way of ensuring that the process meets the needs of communities, and can contribute to long-term peace.

I strongly emphasize that families should be consulted and/or be a part of mediation processes – the Colombian peace process serves as an example. It is important that the missing be on everyone’s agenda as soon as conflict breaks out – the focus should be on preventing people going missing as much as possible.

It is also important to understand that including the missing in a peace agreement is an important beginning but the problem does not end there – and Nepal is one of the many examples of this:  all actors must ensure and support implementation of such agreements. Families in Nepal are still waiting for answers 18 years after the end of conflict.

Finally, I would like to remind you all, that States need to do more to bring answers to families, and need to intensify and accelerate their efforts. “Time works against us”. The families would like to remind States that they seek their continued support in mobilising the concerned authorities to find the  “political will” and the needed resources in order for families to find truth, answers and justice. There is no sustainable peace without individual peace.

We, families of missing, would like to encourage States to adopt missing persons legislation and appropriate legal frameworks in all countries where there are missing persons. This should include the creation of specific offices that address the search and the inclusion of families in all aspects of their work; all families should be heard and seen by authorities. States should emphasize the implementation of UNSC Resolution 2474 through translating it into the widest and deepest possible action.

Thank you.

Click here for coverage of Ram’s statement in the Kathmandu Post